The Cockroach Theory for Self-development

 Response Vs Reaction

At a restaurant, a cockroach suddenly flew from somewhere and sat on a lady. She started screaming out of fear. With a panic stricken face and trembling voice, she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach.

Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group also got panicky.
 
The lady finally managed to push the cockroach away but ...it landed on another lady in the group.Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the drama.
 
The waiter rushed forward to their rescue.In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter. The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behavior of the cockroach on his shirt.

When he was confident enough, he grabbed it with his fingers and threw it out of the restaurant. Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behaviour?If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed?

He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos. It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach that disturbed the ladies

  
I realized that, it is not the shouting of my father or my boss or my wife that disturbs me, but it's my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me.  More than the problem, it's my reaction to the problem that creates chaos in my life.
 
Lessons learnt from the story:
I understood, I should not react in life.
I should always respond.
The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.
 
Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always well thought of, just and right to save a situation from going out of hand, to avoid cracks in relationship, to avoid taking decisions in anger, anxiety, stress or hurry. 

   

Do you really love me?

One day, I woke early in the morning to watch the sunrise.
Ah the beauty of God’s creation is beyond description.
As I watched, I praised God for His beautiful work.
As I sat there, I felt the Lord’s presence with me.

He asked me, “Do you love me?”
I answered, “Of course, God! You are my Lord and Savior!”
Then He asked,“If you were physically handicapped, would you still love me?”
I was perplexed. I looked down upon my arms, legs and the rest of my body and wondered how many things I wouldn’t be able to do, the things that I took for granted.

And I answered, “It would be tough Lord, but I would still love You.”
Then the Lord said, “If you were blind, would you still love my creation?”

How could I love something without being able to see it? Then I thought of all the blind people in the world and how many of them still loved God and His creation.

So I answered, “Its hard to think of it, but I would still love you.”
The Lord then asked me, “If you were deaf, would you still listen to my word?”

How could I listen to anything being deaf? Then I understood.
Listening to God’s Word is not merely using our ears, but our hearts.

 I answered, “It would be tough, but I would still listen to Your word.”
The Lord then asked, “If you were mute, would you still praise My Name?”

How could I praise without a voice?
Then it occurred to me: God wants us to sing from our very heart and soul. It never matters what we sound like. And praising God is not always with a song, but when we are persecuted, we give God praise with our words of thanks.

 So I answered, “Though I could not physically sing, I would still praise Your Name.
And the Lord asked, “Do you really love Me?”

With courage and a strong conviction,
 I answered boldly, “Yes Lord! I love You because You are the one and true God!”

I thought I had answered well, but God asked,

“THEN WHY DO YOU SIN?”

I answered, “Because I am only human. I am not perfect.”

“THEN WHY IN TIMES OF PEACE DO YOU STRAY THE FURTHEST?
WHY ONLY IN TIMES OF TROUBLE DO YOU PRAY THE EARNEST?”

No answers. Only tears.

The Lord continued:
“Why only sing at fellowships and retreats? Why seek Me only in times of worship? Why ask things so selfishly? Why ask things so unfaithfully?”

The tears continued to roll down my cheeks.

“Why are you ashamed of Me? Why are you not spreading the good news? Why in times of persecution, you cry to others when I offer My shoulder to cry on? Why make excuses when I give you opportunities to serve in My Name?”

I tried to answer, but there was no answer to give.

“You are blessed with life. I made you not to throw this gift away. I have blessed you with talents to serve Me, but you continue to turn away. I have revealed My Word to you, but you do not gain in knowledge. I have spoken to you but your ears were closed. I have shown My blessings to you, but your eyes were turned away. I have sent you servants, but you sat idly by as they were pushed away. I have heard your prayers and I have answered them all.”

“DO YOU TRULY LOVE ME ?”

I could not answer. How could I? I was embarrassed beyond belief. I had no excuse. What could I say to this? When the tears had flowed, I said, “ Please forgive me Lord. I am unworthy to be Your child.”

The Lord answered,

“ That is My Grace, My child.”

I asked, “ Then why do you continue to forgive me? Why do You love me so?”

The Lord answered,

“ Because you are My creation. You are my child. I will never abandon you.
When you cry, I will have compassion and cry with you.
When you shout with joy, I will laugh with you.
When you are down, I will encourage you.
When you fall, I will raise you up.
When you are tired, I will carry you.
I will be with you till the end of days, and I will love you forever.”

Never had I cried so hard before. How could I have been so cold? How could I have hurt God as I had done?

 I asked God, “How much do You love me?”

The Lord stretched out His arms, and I saw His nail-pierced hands.
I bowed down at the feet of Christ, my Savior.
And for the first time, I truly prayed.

The true LOVE CHRIST has for us

When True Love stays aside of any human 's life...
loneliness takes the place prolonging nights and days.

When True Love is not near, what song you use to hear?
what means time and space? which are the special days?

When Love remains so far and you resemble tire, 
to whom you will require? where will be your desire?

When True Love is abide with whom you can comply?
Who will respond your call and hear you at all?

When True Love stays inside the soul enjoys it's truthfulness 
you hear His voice reply; your heart remains rely.

When True Love overflows something makes your face glows; 
Love enjoys your free soul looking at the Great Goal.

When True Love states His kingdom you recover the reason;
you retrieve your lost smile; yours becomes a new life. 

When True Love really arrives never you will be abide;
you will live in Victory since you are seeing His Glory.

This is the magnificent love

the LOVE CHRIST  haves for us.

THE PLEASURE OF LOVE

Valentine is over, all can be discussed is whether you were shown the affection or not. Some people (maybe or mostly men) find themselves in a cocoon to celebrate it with no choice to show this ' love'. To me Love isn't an obligation but a privilege.

You can not love by pressure or duty, but because it's the greatest pleasure in life, love by choice, because you love, not love to meet any rules, or to make merit to anyone you love for the simple and wonderful pleasure love.

I love you, and now accept the adventure of exploring and discovering what guards you beyond your mask and your defenses.
I look fondly your deepest feelings, your fears, your weaknesses, your hopes and joys, your pain and your desires.
I love you, and understand that behind your armor is a sensitive heart and lonely, hungry for a helping hand and a sincere smile on you can feel at home.
I love you, and with the greatest respect I understand that the disharmony and chaos in that sometimes you live are the product of your ignorance and your unconsciousness. I realize that if you generate unhappiness is because you have not learned to grow joys, and sometimes you feel so empty and so meaningless, you can not trust yourself and recognize your wealth, but at this moment, discover and honor above any appearance, your true identity and your value and honestly appreciate your infinite greatness as a unique and unrepeatable expression of Life.

I love you, and frankly today I offer you the opportunity to be heard with deep attention, interest and respect. I accept your experience without trying to change it, but to understand. I offer a space where you can discover yourself without fear of being qualified, where you feel confident open up, without being forced to reveal what they consider private.

I love you, recognize, and from this moment you show that you have the inalienable right to choose your own path, but doesn't match mine. From this moment, I let you discover your inner truth for yourself, your way, I appreciate you unconditionally, without judging, without reprobarte, without asking you to act according to my expectations, without requiring you to conform you to my ideals have the right to be yourself.

I love you and appreciate you for who you are, not because they want you to like me. I trust your ability to learn from your experiences and getting out of your falls, stronger, more mature, I have full faith and absolute trust in your power as an individual.

I love you, and I enjoy the fortune to voluntarily commit to you, from this day and actively respond to your need for personal development. I believe in you when you doubt, I spread my vitality and my enthusiasm when you're about to give up, you support when you falter, I encourage you when the hesitation, I take the hands firmly when you feel weak, I trust you when something overwhelmed, and gently caress you when something sad, without letting myself be carried away by your misery.

I love you, I share your joy and I rejoice with you when you feel happy. I delight in your presence, but not intend to possess, enjoy your company but do not want to hold you or hinder your flight. Savoring the gift of sharing in this for the simple pleasure of being together without ties or obligations imposed by the spontaneous decision to answer freely.

I don't want me, I love you you, I love you free, I love you, as I love the breeze that comes and goes and touches my cheek.

I love you, and I have enough humility to receive your gentleness and your love without playing the role of which needs nothing, I accept it gladly gave me, but I demand that you give what you can not or do not want.

I love you and thank you to life the wonder of your existence, I feel your presence as a blessing in my way, thanks for being.

I love you, why not just depend on you as if it were up would not be love but lack, do not depend on you, I love you.
Today enjoy our meeting, knowing that every day is an adventure uncertain and that tomorrow is a mystery perennial. From today, live as if the last day that
I can share with you, so that each encounter is so intense and so deep as if for the first time I took her hand, and in this way I do it everyday is always different and miraculous creation.

I dare show my affection spontaneously through my eyes, my gestures and smiles, my firm and delicate touch, my vigorous embrace, my kisses, frank and simple words, I love you.

I value you for who you are, I appreciate your inner riches, even those that you yourself know about. I see your latent potential and from now collaborate to flourish seed that is dormant within you. Your personal development matters I honestly count on me and from that moment I let you discover your creative skills and your ability to breath all the fruit you can give, happy unveiled before your eyes the treasure within you, and cooperate with you to be this life a richer and more meaningful.

I love you, and I love myself and that from this day also I dare to set my own limits and keep them firmly, and I respect myself and therefore with all my love, don't let my personal rights transgress, nor do I tie or abridging my freedom to be who I'm.

I love you and I have so much confidence in myself and in you, without fear that harm our human relationship, from this moment I'm free to express my anger, without offending you, and I can say what bothers me and bothers without trying to hurt you or hurt you, I'm honest, I'm honest with you.

I love you, so I also recognize and respect your limitations and so I appreciate you, but don't idealize. Share and enjoy the agreements and accept disagreements, and I say with absolute certainty that if the day came when our roads were obviously hopelessly inconsistent, I'm able to leave in peace and harmony, so we both remember with shared gratitude for the treasures.

I love you and I see in you more than your individuality as a person and I value you perceive you as an expression of man as a visible manifestation of this transcendent, intangible essence called Human Being, of which I'm one.
Through you I recognize the indescribable miracle of human nature that is my own nature, with all its greatness and limitations; through you, I can appreciate both the bright and shining facets of humanity and its dark and gloomy side .

I love you, and you love the whole human being and I love the true human nature as it is.

I love you and I love myself and I'm proud to be a worthy and valuable note in the symphony of this world.

Jesus own Promise

I never said that I would give you silver or gold
Or that you would never feel the fire or shiver in the cold
But I did say you'd never walk thru this world alone
And I did say don't make this world your home

I never said that fear wouldn't find you in the night
Or that loneliness was something you'd never have to fight
But I did say I'd be right there by your side
And I did say I'll always help you fight

'Cause you know I made a promise that I intend to keep
My grace will be sufficient in your time of need
My love will be the anchor that you can hold on to
This is the promise, this is the promise I've made to you

I never said that friends would never turn their backs on you
Or that the world around you wouldn't see you as a fool
But I did say like me you'll surely be despised
And I did say My ways confound the wise

I didn't say you'd never taste the bitter kiss of death
Or have to walk thru chilly Jordan to enter into rest
But I did say I'd be waiting right on the other side
And I did say I'll dry every tear you've cried

'Cause you know I made a promise that I've prepared a place
And someday sooner than you think you'll see me face to face
And you'll sing with the angels and a countless multitude
This is the promise, this is the promise I've made to you

So just keep on walking don't turn to the left or right
And in the midst of darkness let this be your light
That hell can't separate us and you're gonna make it thru
This is the promise, this is the promise I've made to you
Oh, this is the promise, this is the promise I've made to you

Why I take a glass of water before sleeping

About 90% of heart attacks occur early in the morning and it can be minimized if one takes a glass or two of water NOT grog or beer before retiring in the evening.

I knew water is important but I never knew about the special times to drink it.Did you??

Drinking water at the correct time Maximizes its effectiveness on the Human body :

1 glasses of water after waking up - helps activate internal organs

1 glass of water 30 minutes before a meal - helps digestion

1 glass of water before taking a bath - helps lower blood pressure

1 glass of water before going to bed - avoids stroke or heart attack

Making the vow

No matter how deep the sadness or wide the pain,
I vow to live for a brighter day will come again.


No matter how many mistakes I’ve made in the past,
I vow to live and in the future avoid them, surefooted and fast.


No matter how many tragedies beyond my control take place,
I vow to live and stay my course within this race.


No matter how poor or rich I may ever be,
I vow to live and aspire to search for the dignity in simplicity.


No matter how much a lover may pierce the inner core of my heart,
I vow to live for like spring I’ll get a new start.


No matter how isolated and alone I may feel,
I vow to live and do something for someone else to heal.


No matter how hopeless my situation my appear,
I vow to live and reflect until my viewpoint is clear.


No matter what happens in this life – good or bad
I vow to live, do my best, and just for living – be glad.

By Malcolm O. Varner

My morning mail

Hello Bhakitah Bosoah,

Imagine there is a bank that credits your account each morning with Kshs. 86,400.

It carries over no balance from day to day.
Every evening the bank deletes whatever part of the balance you failed to use during the day.What would you do? Draw out every cent, of course!!!!

Each of us has such a bank. Its name is TIME.

Every morning, it credits you with 86,400 seconds.
Every night it writes off, as lost, whatever of this you have failed to invest to good purpose.
It carries over no balance. It allows no overdraft.
Each day it opens a new account for you.
Each night it burns the remains of the day. If you fail to use the day's deposits, the loss is yours.There is no going back. There is no drawing against the "tomorrow".

You must live in the present on today's deposits. Invest it so as to get from it the utmost in health, happiness, and success!

The clock is running. Make the most of today.

To realize the value of ONE YEAR, ask a student who failed a grade.

To realize the value of ONE MONTH, ask a mother who gave birth to a premature baby.

To realize the value of ONE WEEK, ask the editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize the value of ONE HOUR, ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.

To realize the value of ONE MINUTE, ask a person who missed the train.

To realize the value of ONE SECOND, ask a person who just avoided an accident.

Treasure every moment that you have! And reassure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time.

Remember that time waits for no one.
Yesterday is history.
Tomorrow is mystery.
Today is a gift.
That's why it's called the present!

Yours faithfuly,
.
.
.

Rising above the reality with Courage

Courage is the power to face your difficulties.
It comes from the reserves of your mind
That are more powerful then any
of your outside circumstances.

When you recognize that you are
bigger than your problems,
You gain the courage necessary
to overcome anything.

Your obstacles will look large or small to you
According to whether you are large or small.
Courage is the capacity

To confront what can be imagined.
It gives you the ability
to rise above reality.
You are more important
than any of your problems.

Twelve ways to stay on top of stress

1. Exercise. Amen for endorphins. Believe me, they've helped me many days with my perspective. If you have to work out, then go take a brisk walk and get that blood flowing. It isn't about working out to lose weight -- it's about being healthy and staying sane.
2. Eat the real stuff. Crappy food (fast, processed, and loaded with sugar) doesn't help your chemical brain and body handle stress. Living food, real food, helps support your mind and body while it's trying to deal with the million things coming its way. Every time I reach for the chocolate, I'm looking to feel something from it. Don't get me wrong -- if it's just a little here and there because I enjoy the taste of it, great. But if I'm using it the minute I feel overwhelmed, then that's when that food is no longer OK to eat. It doesn't make the problem go away, and then I just feel bad about eating the food to pacify myself. Grab green food instead. Put things in your mouth that are going to support your immune function and keep you levelheaded.
3. Notice. Try not to let the stress overtake you. Recognize the situations that cause the stress and notice them coming your way. You have a better shot at fending off the full effects of the stress when you can anticipate it.
4. Get it off your chest. Talk to a friend or partner about the stress. Sometimes just getting it off your chest can help unload some of the burden.
5. Keep your sense of humor. If you do have the chance to talk about it, try to see the irony and humor in the wacky bits. I think someone is dead in the water once they lose their sense of humor.
6. Stay grateful. My daughter has large lungs and verbal skills she likes to display. Just when I start to wishfully think about her being quiet, I remind myself to be grateful that she can talk to me at all. In almost all of our problems are boatloads of blessings. "Oh, I don't feel like going to the gym."  Well, Amen that you have the means and the health to even be able to wrestle with the idea of going to work out. Make a habit of saying thank you. You will notice the sunny spots a lot more often, and not just the gray skies and storms.
7. Ask, "What's the hurry?"  Have some fun. We're always so busy going somewhere, we miss just enjoying the moment. If an opportunity comes your way to do something fun, take it.
8. Take a deep breath. When you feel the stress getting to you, take a moment. Get away, even if it's just for an hour, to be with yourself and your thoughts. Some people like to take a walk, meditate, lock themselves away in a beautiful bath, or go to church. Find the peace and the silence.
9. Keep it simple. Simplify where you can. Does Junior really need to be in 78 activities at the age of 5?  Do you have to go to every little party or gathering you're invited to?
10. Turn of the TV. A lot of it is bad news anyway, and it robs us of hours that we could use to be getting other things done. Since everyone complains that they have no time, get some by unplugging from the tube.
11. Sleep. If you're rested, you have a better shot at handling things. Not to mention, you may not stress out as easily if you have a chance to recover at night.
12. Drink water. I have said it before: Americans consume 21 percent of their calories through liquid consumption. Hydrate with water. Help you entire system function better just by drinking enough water. Oh, and by the way, if you don't think that weight loss and proper hydration have a relationship, think again. Shift the paradigm on its side -- don't think about exercise and nutritional eating just as something you have to suffer through to get into those jeans. Instead, think of them as armor that will protect you in this crazy world, with all of the bazillion details you deal with every day. 

Between stimulus and response

Between Stimulus and Response, we have the freedom to Response" - Stephen R. Covey.It was a Sports Stadium.

Eight Children were standing on the track to participate in a running event.

* Ready! * Steady! * Bang !!!

With the sound of Toy pistol,

All eight girls started running.

Hardly had they covered ten to fifteen steps,

when one of the smaller girls slipped and fell down,

Due to bruises and pain she started crying.

When the other seven girls heard the little girl cry they stopped running, stood for a while and turned back.

Seeing the girl on the track they all ran to help.

One among them bent down, picked her up and kissed her gently

And enquired as to how she was..

They then lifted the fallen girl pacifying her.

Two of them held her firmly while all seven joined hands together and walked together towards the winning post........ .

There was pin drop silence at the spectator's stand.

Officials were shocked.

Slow claps multiplied to thousands as the spectators stood up in appreciation.

Many eyes were filled with tears

And perhaps even God's!

YES.!! This happened in Hyderabad [INDIA], recently!

The sport was conducted by
National Institute of Mental Health.

All these special girls had come to participate in this event

They were spastic children.

Yes, they were Mentally Challenged.

What did they teach the WORLD.?

Teamwork.?

Humanity.?

Equality among all.??

No...... They taught..........

Successful people help others who are slow in learning..............So that they are not left far behind !

This is really a great message... Spread it.!

We never do this because we have brains !!!!

Lyf

Get more of Modern Christianity

3 important things in life

3 things in life that never come back when gone:
- TIME
- WORDS
- OPPORTUNITY.
3 things in life that should never be lost:
- HONESTY
- HOPE
- PEACE
3 things in life that are most valuable:
- LOVE
- FAITH
- PRAYER
3 things in life that makes a person:
- HARD WORK
- SINCERITY
- COMMITMENT
3 things in life that can destroy a person:
- LUST
- PRIDE
- ANGER.

Just keep in mind for you to avoid making solid mistakes in life.

AS FAR AS THERE IS LIFE, THERE IS HOPE

If you are SINGLE and keep on saying "I DON'T TRUST MEN OR WOMEN!" remember... your mates are getting married every Saturday. Let me ask you, are they marrying spirits? Wise up!

If you are MARRIED and keep saying "I HATE THIS MARRIAGE!" OK! Is it not married people like you that are celebrating Gold, Silver and even Platinum jubilee?

If you keep on ranting, ''I'M LEAVING MY MAN, HE CHEATED ON ME!" Please, go to town and see all the fine, cute, sexy, hot, hungry and desperate chicks waiting to snatch your man's money and property, they don't even mind sharing. Make it work, my friend!

Stop saying "I HATE MY JOB!" Look! 20million people are jobless and can't even find any not to talk of keeping it! Do you want to join them?

You keep saying "I HATE WHERE I LIVE!" Oh please!
*tears*
Try visiting those locations that are flooding now, people who are internally displaced, people living in the street corners, people leaving in tin/zinc shacks in winter or people living/sleeping under the bridge at night and you will be grateful to God that you even have a place to stay!

Some say "I AM TIRED OF THIS LIFE!" Well, go to the hospital and see people fighting for their lives! Go to the mortuary and take a look then tell me what you feel after that!

My point is, be positive and believe in God, that's all that matters.
AS FAR AS THERE IS LIFE, THERE IS HOPE. JUST KEEP TRYING AND TRUSTING IN GOD, EVERYTHING WILL BE ALL RIGHT MY DEAR FRIENDS.

Life should not be a trip to the tomb with the intention of reaching it with good health and an attractive and well cared for body; it should be more like a ride on a great water slide, with big piece of chocolate in one hand and a glass of good wine in the other,with a body totally worn out from good living, and yelling.......I had a life  on earth and am glad my schedule is over!www.kapes.yolasite.com